Out of Reach

by Commoner

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lyrics

When we were all kids
I would wish I could be invisible
To dissipate from all my friends
So my escape became predictable
I am the king of hide and seek
You all deserve a better version of me
But I’m so stuck inside my head
I can’t kill these things that make me weak
And I’m so tired of creating an excuse
To excuse the mental abuse
I put you through
No one should have to search
For validation of a friendship
Like you do.
So here’s the truth
I'm sorry for all my selfishness these past few years
And I honestly didn’t expect for it to get as bad as it did
You still check up on me
Even though we both know I don’t deserve it
But you’d be better off without me
Just know that I am sorry.

I’m a waste
Of your time
You will end up losing me
So I’m giving you an exit
Take away everything
Out of reach
I am a leech
And I deserve nothing at all
Take back all your love
Take it back
So you can escape from me
Cause I deserve nothing at all

And I feel like I’ve been suspended in the air for the past few years
and my head has been hollowed out
for the wind to pass through me
and in the jet stream flowing
from ear to ear,
I hear a reminder
that I’m being held up by everything
other than my own free will
And all this weight
Inside my feet,
Of the stress trying to bury me
Sending enigmatic shockwaves
up throughout my body
I’m a disassociating disappointment
Drowning in a well of fear
And I was too ashamed to ask for help
So I let the stress build up for years
But Like ripples moving stable water
I will settle and survive, again
I just wish I could control my body
And I just wish you could understand

I don’t want to feel like this anymore

credits

released September 25, 2020

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about

Commoner Lawrence, Kansas

We're just here so our mom's don't see how sad we are.

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